Noise relaxes me. I say noise instead of just music, but it's not always music. More often than not it's a random action repeated over and over live, I guess. Instead of recorded.

For example, one time I heard someone cutting paper with scissors. Nothing special, just a person doing a mundane task. But the sound of those scissors going through that paper instantly relaxed me. Slice and then clip, Slice...clip, Slice...clip. Its as though my ears blocked out all of the traffic, finally settling on just one. I could have sat there all day listening to those scissors.

It could be how someone chews their gum or leaves crunching under my shoes. It could be the sounds of a vacuum or wind whistling through trees. Or, in my latest youtube obsession, the sound of cooking utensils being moved about while making various recipes.

But it happens a lot. And in the weirdest of places.



Like on our way home from visiting my brother: a woman was reading a book, circling phrases and words that she wanted to remember. First, it was the calm movement of her hands that caught my eye.

Yes, I am the weirdo taking photos of a random woman's hands.



But then I heard it. The scratchy sound of pencil on paper, followed by an occasional erase and then finally a swipe of the shavings. I almost asked R to change seats, just so I could close my eyes and let the sound envelope me.

Does that ever happen to you? Or am I alone in this secret world of noises.

Reading Character At Sight

Not so long ago, I was digging through some books at an estate sale and came across these beauties. From 1918, they delve into how to read people's character (and your own character).



As I skimmed the chapter titles, my eyes got bigger and bigger. Oh my... Oh wow... and I started to fan myself.  If only Geneva Wollard had read this before she went on her dating rampage back in 1915, her list may have been longer. You gotta see what was written in an old Charles Dickens novel!



So I took my time looking at the headings... Not really wanting to read the description, knowing it would dispell my first initial reaction.

The Refined, Sensitive, Beauty-Loving Man - Oh hello, sir. Look at that rose sunset. Sure, I'll sit on this blanket with you. Tea? Why thank you, kind gentleman.

The Vigorous, Virile, Coarse Man - Yes, the sunset is divine isn't it. But who is that laboring in the field below? He's just so, so virile. I think I'll take a walk. NO! Ahem, I mean, no thanks, you don't need to accompany me. I'm just going to stretch my legs... right through those hay fields.

The Hard, Unsympathetic, Driving, Close-Fisted Man - On my way to meet Mr. Legends of the Fall, I trip and tumble down the hill. The 7th Earl of Carolyn's Daydreams rode up on horseback and yelled at me to get off his property. Oh, how rude you are! I was only taking a walk. But I'm sure there's a sweet man inside you somewhere.

[side note: this is taking the tone of Beauty of the Beast, one of my most hated Disney movies. But it is any easy plot, so I write on...]

The Impressionable, Indolent, Extravagant Man - The King is taking a tour of his countryside and happens upon the scene. He calls out for the nice young woman with graying hair to please ride home in his carriage. Why thank you King! While we're in here, let's talk about your son...



At the end of each lesson, you are given activities. One of which is to observe people and list where they rank in each category.

What have you learned at the end of this lesson? (Besides that Carolyn needs friends. Real ones this time.)

Put Baby back in the corner.

This is what happens when your husband and you scoff at paying $15 for a haircut and decide to do it on your own.

You ask for a simple bob...



...and get this. Are you supposed to see every layer?

R said he just picked a layer and went with it. Guess I should have clarified to not pick the shortest one. My bad. And now it's everyone who has to stand behind me in line's bad too.



Go back to your corner, Baby.

Stars

R said that if a star were ever made for me, it would look like this.



But, hey, at least I wouldn't be right next to the sewer line like Jerry Lewis.

Tim Tams

We found a way to watch LOST live on our computer. Normally we have to wait until it's been uploaded to the site, which takes about a day. I'm not telling the name of the site because I don't want it to be found. It's my little secret island, if you will.

Immediately after we found it, I exclaimed that now all we need is chocolate! Here's how my brain works:

celebration = chocolate, sadness = chocolate, fright = chocolate, paranoia = chocolate, explaining how my brain works = chocolate.



Then R smiled. He asked me to wait a few minutes because he was already working on something. After I turned from the clock's minute hand, I looked to see what he had made.

Two cups of hot chocolate with a plate of cookies!  Awesome.

But these weren't just any cookies. These were Tim Tams. And you best include a pause after saying its name so everyone can bow their heads in adoration.

R studied for a semester in Australia and these apparently are the sacred cookies of Down Under. Everyone loves them. Up until recently, it was hard to find them in the U.S.

There's a catch however: there's a correct way of eating them. I even found a bunch of youtube videos later demonstrating it.

Let me list out the steps.

1. Bite off both ends.

2. So that it looks like this, but less blurry.

3. Then, dip it into your drink (we used hot chocolate) like a straw. Suck on the cookie until you just barely taste the liquid.

4.  Once you feel it, pop the cookie into your mouth followed by an optional gulp.

It. is. heavenly.

The cookie just melts into this silky chocolate mess. Oh my, go out and get some... like, now.

 

Sugar with a Handle

When a sugar bag has a handle on it, you know you're going off the deep end. I don't care.

We went almost two weeks without bread because I made up excuses as to why I didn't have time to bake it. There is nothing so disheartening as knowing you can't even make a measly sandwich if your stomach growls. Not even a PB&J. When I was craving grilled cheese and soup while sick last week, R ran to the store to buy a loaf.

I've never heard so much hissing and yelling in my life. He expressed over and over how much he wished it were the bread I usually make. I didn't show it, but boy did that make me feel proud of what I had been accomplishing in the baking department.



After that episode, I made sure I'd have enough supplies for the upcoming months. Partly because I need to get a little more farmwife in me (i.e. discipline), and also because we are setting a strict lunch routine.

Everyday we are going to have the same thing to eat, with a little variation in 'type'. A sandwich, yogurt, vegetable, string cheese, and maybe a dessert. I don't use sugar in my bread, honey instead, but we do like our banana bread and chocolate cake, so I stocked up for that maybe factor. We will make the lunches the night before and not worry about it in the morning.

Little things. We're learning.

But this menu requires bread, folks, and a steady supply of it.



So I got started.

This time around, though, Miss Carolyn got wild and crazy. She added oats. Yes, that's my partying side when it comes to bread. One day I'll even attempt sourdough starter.

Can I get three snaps in a Z-formation, please?



But for now, I'll stick to my sometimes awkwardly shaped, whatever flour I have on hand, bread. Don't let R's yawn fool you, it really is exciting.

Hearts

You can find them everywhere.

In nature: on a rock wall...

Or in a restaurant: on a ranch-dipped buffalo wing.

I love them both equally.

From my heart to yours: Hope you had a wonderful Valentine's Day!

My Kind of Medication

I really wasn't in the mood to go out and about tonight. I've been sick the past few days and a night of watching movies and laying around sounded ideal. However, we had spent the majority of the morning organizing our dorm room sized apartment and decided a Sam's Club trip was necessary.

So I bundled up my snotty nose and off we went, half hoping they'd be serving their samples like our last Date Night there. Along the way, R caught a sign for Chick-Fil-A and murmured how nice it would be to stop there. But free is free and we knew we could count on ole Sammy.

As we piled up our cart, something was blatantly missing from the store. There were no hair nets around! And you know what that means. No samples, people.

R took that opportunity to drop a giant hint that if I loved him we'd go to Chick-Fil-A. And, for once, I agreed; instead of dragging him somewhere that I wanted to eat.



And boy did it pay to be unselfish! We walked in and noticed a sign stating there was a 'Pre-Valentine's Day Dinner'. We looked at each other, then ordered our food.



As we turned the corner with our tray, we saw an entire room filled with fresh flowers, lit candles and tablecloths! So we sat down in our little nook and even put napkins on our laps.

A few minutes later, two dressed-up people walked in...



...and they started performing for us! They sang Italian ballads sprinkled with American music like Stand By Me, which of course made me well up. Love that song.

R asked me to wipe my tears away along with the booger in my left nostril.

It was such a nice surprise and gave a me an extra boost of energy, which was needed because across the parking lot was a Barnes & Noble. And we all know the pull books have on me and R.

So we popped in and within 5 minutes, heard the sound of instruments.



I weaved myself among the shelves of books and finally found them. A saxophone quartet! Complete with chairs to listen.



R went off to buy some coffee and I sat there, the lone person in a chair, listening. I closed my eyes and let the music work over me.

One of the players asked if I played, and I said, "No. I just appreciate." Which is going to be my motto from now on.

I don't act or sing or play an instrument. But I appreciate those who do. And even if I'm the only one in the audience, I'll still clap heartily to show them how much.

Two performances in one night. I'm going to bed with a smile on my face. And this time it's not because of Nyquil.

Popsicles

I was at a thrift store the other day and found some old popsicle forms. Man, I had to snatch them up!

These were the fancy kind with a little spout from which you could sip the drained juice.



So I ran to the store and bought some grape juice and filled those buggers up. If there's one juice that instantly brings me back to my childhood, it's grape juice.



Then I popped them into the freezer where they fit nicely amongst stew, chili, and vodka.

Lovely.



Later, I indulged in the fruits of my labor (literally), while watching Intervention.

Please do not look at the smudge marks on our computer screen. Thank you.

R and I need to be intervened on how we interact while taking photos. I asked for one measly shot of me holding the popsicle and this is what happened. It's not pretty.

Catalina Island and beyond...

I'm not feeling very wordy today. So just follow me through the last day on Catalina Island...

But first, the night before. We popped a few more advil and sat in front of the fire to watch the sunset. Later, we would all snuggle our way into the tent to play Taboo for a couple hours. Knowing it was cold outside and us warm and safe in our sleeping bags helped soothe our achy bodies.



But I couldn't sleep. And neither could my brother.

So we spent most of the night staring at the moon and its reflection on the water, quietly thinking to ourselves. That's the good thing about M. You don't need to converse. You can just sit and drown yourself in thought.

Morning came almost too soon.



But, with morning came the sun. And oh how wonderful it felt on our faces.

So, let me take you on the hike back. I want you to imagine a slight breeze, crisp air, and warm sunshine. The ground was dry, but you could feel the moisture on everything green.

We hiked up hills, cut through the Others' neighborhood, ducked under canopies of trees... All of this with a smile on our faces. We were happy.



We arrived a couple hours later and enjoyed a nice lunch at the restaurant and a game of speed on Tinkerbell playing cards. And no, they weren't my cards. I had a falling out with Disney while working at an Equity Center in college. It was ugly. R had to endure the brunt of my anger so no one else would.



On the way back, I refused to sit inside. Instead, I wrapped myself up in a sleeping bag and sat on the top deck with eyes closed, just embracing the wind. I could live outdoors.



The next day we intended to hike up to the Hollywood sign, but we didn't make it very far. Our legs hurt.



This is what happens when I ask the brothers-in-law to "get together". R just stares at M's outreached hand.

We had a really good time. M & D were great hosts and you could tell they really wanted us to enjoy ourselves. And we did. Thanks you two!

A and I shared a bed for many years...

Did that get your attention?

I hope so. I hope it also got CBS's attention as well.

Because our small town was having auditions for the Amazing Race last Saturday. I mean, really? This teeny place? So I called my sister, who didn't have much going on in the next few months, to make a quick roadtrip. She hadn't seen our dorm room yet, anyway.



A piled up the car and trucked on down. On the way, she got lost, which was extremely appropriate for the occasion.

When she arrived we sat down and filled out the application. Things were going well until we got to this one: What is your biggest pet peeve about your teammate? Now if only the cameras were on during that segment. R sat wide-eyed and silent; trying to not be noticed. Because if he had been, we'd have eaten him alive.

Fine. You're moody. THERE. Yeah, well you're flaky. SO DOUBLE THERE.

and after we wrestled and pulled each other's hair for a bit, everything settled down.



We made it to the casting place, conveniently located at a casino, and stared at our competition.



I mean, couldn't we at least beat this guy?

And what the heck was I wearing? Isn't this a casting call? Here I am with wet hair, a free t-shirt we won from a 5K race, my husband's vest, and highwater pants. Every casting director's dream.



So we sit down and kinda go over memories and other fun details about ourselves. You know, picturing the audition as someone throwing out questions really fast. Man, were we on it. Sitting in that room, waiting our turn... we were on fire.

And then.

And then a lady walked in and told everyone to listen up. This is how it's gonna work. You walk in, give your applications to one of the guys and then you'll have two minutes to do whatever you want. So get pumped up!

A and I looked at each other and I felt a little vomit come up my throat. Anything we want? [silent scream]. We were not prepared.

Luckily, A is in marketing/advertising and just naturally an outgoing character. So she patted my hand and said, "Carrie, just follow my lead, okay? You'll be fine. I'll carry us and you just pipe in whenever you want." So loving. Such a leader.

"Team 14!!!!" someone yelled on the overhead. We took a deep breath and walked into the room. After we handed over the application, they positioned us in front of the camera and said, "Go!"

We managed to get the opening out which was basically our names and then...

[crickets]

I looked over at my leader A in desperation and she was standing there, with this weird downward smile I'd never seen on her, just looking up at me. So I panicked and started rambling. And if any of you ever heard me talk under pressure, this is the worst possible scenario. I don't even remember what I said, but I do remember dropping the phrase Passive Aggressive hoping to get a little spark in the room.

Nothing.

We literally said nothing. A wrapped it up and they turned off the camera. It was extremely uncomfortable. No one looked at us. And we left.



So what did we do? We called up R to have some drinks with a couple Debbie Downers. We tried to convince ourselves that the show really was looking for two people who couldn't spit out any coherent words and spoke in monotone voices followed by awkward silences. Right?

But R wouldn't have any of it. He said, "Look. There is no line. Have some more food and liquid courage and GO BACK IN THERE." It was like Hoosiers all over again.



He dragged us to the car and drove us back. When we walked in, the room had been cleared out for several hours and the cameramen were bored.

I left it up to single cute girl, A, to seal the deal. They said, sure why not and that they could splice the new audition over the old one. We asked R to stand on the sidelines this time because we knew he'd laugh at us. I don't even care if it wouldn't be with us, someone just laugh for goodness sake.



We stand in our appropriate spots for the second time and jumped in. Our hook? That we shared a bed for many years as kids, which is true and now all of you guys know. Oh well.

But that wasn't it. Not only did we share a bed for many years, but I did once pee in the bed. After I realized what I had done, I sat on top of my pillow and watched it trickle down to A...watching in slow motion as she came unglued.

See? Teammates, right there.

In the middle of our two minutes, there came the same awkward pause. But instead of succumbing to it, I called it out. "Why is this so awkward, A? [Turning to the camera] I think it's because we think we're funnier than what we really are." A disagreed and pointed out that all of the cameramen were laughing. And I argued further that "no they aren't. They're looking at the ground avoiding eye-contact." And just that little riff instantly calmed us because that's exactly how we would banter. Dry, yet with the same high nasaly voice. We continued with more descriptions of each other (mostly on how moody I am) and eventually got the "wrap-up" motion!

Oh happiness. Even if we don't make it any further, just getting that hand motion made our night.

Well, that and the $2.50 I won on the slot machines.

Wish us luck!!